Shattered Bonds
by Helike
Summary: Now he knows there is no coming back and once again he makes a try at cutting the bonds between them. The bonds that were to last forever. Character death. SPOILERS up to the chapter 398.


Finally written. It differs a lot from what I usually write and is a kind of experiment in fact.

**Warnings:** SPOILERS up to the chapter 398. Big spoilers. More in the author's note at the end.

**Summary:** _Now I know there is no coming back and once again I make a try at cutting the bonds between us. The bonds that were to last forever. _Tragedy/Drama/Angst. Character death.

**I do not own Naruto.** If I did, the brother would be still brothers and the whole massacre would have never happened.

* * *

**Shattered bonds**

_(Sasuke)_

'Let's head home, Sasuke,' I hear my brother say.

I frown at him, fully aware that I seem to be pouting, but I don't care.

'It's always in this way,' I accuse him. 'First, you promise me to teach me something new, but later you say "maybe next time" again and again.'

I avoid looking at my brother's face, because there is something that I don't want him to see. The truth is that I'm angry. Why does my brother promise me all these things, but hardly ever these promises are kept? That's why I choose to look at my feet instead and kick a little stone I see. My fists clench at kunai I hold in my hands.

_Tomorrow. Tomorrow. Tomorrow. It always is tomorrow. And when will this tomorrow finally come?_

'Sasuke...'

I glance at my brother, still feeling a bit aggravated and disappointed, and see him smile and wave at me. Something happens and some magic works. Within a second all these angry thoughts are gone and I run to my brother, smiling at him and...

'Sorry, Sasuke, maybe next time,' I hear my brother's words.

_No... Not again..._

How many times has he done it so far? I press my hand to the place on my forehead which has just been poked and look at my brother, frowning. My brother smiles at me gently and I can't help smiling back – in fact it's impossible to be angry with him for a longer time.

'Let's go home, Sasuke,' he smiles at me again and I smile back.

We go home together, not saying any word, although there is one thing which I would like to be explained to me. But maybe not this time, I quickly decide, and promise myself to ask him about that poking stuff some other day.

* * *

_(Itachi)_

I collect my weapons and decide it's high time to finish my training. There is an important mission I'm having tomorrow and I want to rest.

'Let's head home, Sasuke,' I say glancing at my brother.

It's not hard to notice that he's not pleased with my decision. He frowns immediately, and gives me an angry look.

'It's always in this way,' he says, pouting. 'First, you promise me to teach me something new, but later you say "maybe next time" again and again.'

I sigh. I wish I could deny the words, but I can't, because that's how it has been recently.

I watch my brother.

He hangs his head. After a while he kicks some stone, but stays still and only his little hands clench at the kunai he holds in his hands. It's not so difficult to guess what the boy is thinking about.

'Sasuke...'

I smile at my little brother and wave at him. He glances at me, still pouting, but quickly this expression is replaced by a wide grin and I see my brother run to me.

_Sasuke, my little brother... One day you'll understand._

Once again I catch him off guard and my fingers poke the middle of his forehead.

'Sorry, Sasuke, maybe next time,' I say, once again feeling that twinge of guilt and hoping that one day Sasuke will understand.

Sasuke frowns at me and I can't help smiling at him, wondering when these frowns will change into glares.

'Let's go home, Sasuke,' I add after a while, still smiling, and Sasuke smiles back.

_One day you'll understand, Sasuke. One day. And now let yourself be a child and enjoy these peaceful moments as long as you can. Once you've become shinobi, it all ends._

Sometimes words are unnecessary. That's why this time we go home together in a complete silence.

* * *

_(Sasuke)_

_'Keep this up and become a fine shinobi like your brother.'_

Even now, when I sit on the porch with my brother, I still can hear my father's words.

Brother. Brother. Brother. It hurts that the only person that my father notices is my brother only.

'Dad always talks about you only... All the time,' I say and for a while once again I feel all these feelings that I should not feel at all. Not towards my older brother, at least.

There is some kind of anger, because it's only Itachi that is always noticed, not me. There is some jealousy as well, because at least once I'd like to hear the words that Itachi always hears. There is something else, too... but I suppress the feeling quickly, feeling a strong twinge of guilt.

'Do you dislike me?'

The question is so unexpected that I flinch and stare at him greatly surprised.

_Could it be that he's reading my mind?_

But my brother doesn't look at me, so I quickly calm down. Only that... I can't answer his question, not in the way I'd like and I should, because it feels as if my brother is right. The truth is... No... I can't say it.

My brother seems to sense my hesitance, because he speaks again.

'It's not that bad, you know,' he smiles at me reassuringly. 'Shinobi are hated and despised, because they're said to be a problem.'

But I don't hate you, I want to say... only that I can't. My older brother watches me, there is that questioning look in his eyes, but I can't even utter the words that should be said.

I feel deeply ashamed until I see my brother smile again.

I should have known it. My brother will know the answer anyway.

* * *

_(Itachi)_

'Dad always talks about you only... All the time,' Sasuke says and once again I feel a stab of that dull pain hearing the way in which the words are said.

My little brother has never complained, but I know how hurt he must feel sometimes, when instead of being praised for what he has achieved, he is still said the same words: 'Keep this up and become a fine shinobi like your brother.'

_Father... If only you knew, if you realized that sometimes words might leave cuts as deep as a good sword does. But you don't..._

'Do you dislike me?'

I'm not really sure why I ask this question. It's not that I'm unaware of Sasuke's feelings, but it's more like guessing them than anything else.

I rather feel than see Sasuke flinch and turning his head to look at me and in that short while I realize that maybe what I think is true is not that far from the truth at all. The thought cuts through my heart, causing almost physical pain and making me feel guilty at the same time, because maybe if I had tried harder, my brother wouldn't feel like that now and wouldn't have to struggle with his feelings.

_Are you proud of yourself, father? Are you proud of what you have done? You could make us hate each other._

For a short while I feel anger. There is a short moment when I feel I could hate the man that is our father, but the feeling quickly disappears.

'It's not that bad, you know,' I smile at my brother and do my best at sounding convincing. 'Shinobi are hated and despised, because they're said to be a problem.'

The words are true, but at the same time they cut through my heart in exactly the same way that father's words cut through Sasuke's. Even if shinobi are to be hated, it's not what I would ever want.

I watch my brother, looking for answers that might be written or might not on his face and what I see brings me some unexpected relief. What my brother feels is still far away from real hatred.

_But how long will it take before the feelings change?_

I push this painful thought away and focus on our talk again.

_As long as we have each other, everything will be okay and there is no obstacle we could not overcome together._

I find the comfort in this thought and want to believe in it with the whole of my heart.

* * *

_(Sasuke)_

I look at my brother who is not my brother and my brain refuses to accept the reality.

_How? How could it happen?_

I can't understand. I see my brother's face, but I can't even recognize it as in some way it looks like a strange mask now.

_Why brother? Is it true that you've never loved me? Is it true?_

I want to say these words, but I can't. Instead I stand there, unable to move, caught by the look of these eyes which are not the eyes of my brother anymore.

'If you want to kill me, despise me and resent me,' he says and I know I'll remember the words forever. 'Live a long and unsightly life and run away, clinging to your pitiful life. And once you've got the same eyes as me, come and find me.'

The Sharingan in his eyes change its shape and everything turns black. There is only one thought left.

_Why? Brother..._

* * *

_(Itachi)_

I watch Sasuke standing in front of me and try to kill all these feelings that are still left after this night, but I can't.

_Forgive me, Sasuke._

The thought pops up in my mind, but I push it away almost immediately, because there is no forgiveness for me. Not after what I've done.

All of sudden I feel anger. The feeling is aimed at these who had done nothing to prevent the tragedy that took place. I let my fists clench, and enjoy that feeling for a little longer, before it finally disappears.

Now I know there is no coming back and once again I make a try at cutting the bonds between us. The bonds between me and Sasuke... The bonds that were to last forever.

_Forgive me, Sasuke, for what I have to say._

I look at my little brother, who is now afraid of me and try to ignore the pain I feel. I hide my feelings behind that emotionless face, which is nothing else than another mask I have to wear.

'If you want to kill me, despise me and resent me,' I finally say.

_Forgive me, Sasuke._

'Live a long and unsightly life and run away, clinging to your pitiful life.

_Live, my little brother, live no matter what. Don't kill yourself after this day. This night. Live._

'And once you've got the same eyes as me, come and find me.'

_Find me... and kill me, because it's the only thing I deserved._

I see my little brother's scared face. I activate my Mangekyou Sharingan and put him to sleep. I catch his inert body before it hits the ground and carefully put it on the street.

There is no time left, as now I should immediately leave this place, but I don't want it, not yet.

I reach down and brushes hair away from my sleeping brother's face. Sasuke... Why did it all have to end in this way? I want to touch that face again, I want to brush his hair for this one last time, but I know I can't. There is no time left. I stand up and walk away.

_Forgive me, my little brother, forgive me and forget... Uchiha Itachi you knew is dead. There is no coming back._

* * *

_(Sasuke)_

Once again I meet him. He hasn't changed. His eyes still lack emotions in exactly the same way they did on that night.

'I will kill you...' is all I can say.

I've lived for all these years for this moment only and finally it came. I let my anger guide me and don't hesitate anymore.

_Kill. Kill. I must kill him._

The scenes from the massacre night once again appear in my mind and once again I remember everything that happened back then.

'Just like you told me,' I say through clenched teeth, preparing the jutsu, 'I've hated you and lived only to kill you!'

Chidori shines around my hand when I run toward my brother.

_I won't forgive you... I'll defeat you!_

But once again I fail. I look at my hand caught by my brother's hand and move my eyes to his face. I'm not afraid.

_I've made my decision. There is no coming back._

* * *

_(Itachi)_

_Why are you here Sasuke?_

I look at my little brother who somehow managed to find me in this place. Usually I don't make such mistakes. I was sure I avoided a possible meeting when I made Kisame leave the place in which we stopped for a while in Konoha. Now I see how wrong I was.

Sasuke's eyes shine with anger and with some strange mixture of amusement and sadness I realize that once again the boy did what I told him to do.

_He hates me._

The thought proves how wrong I've been, thinking that I managed to leave my old life behind. I glance at Kisame and Uzumaki boy, trying to come up with the idea of some plan. Something that wouldn't give me away...

For a short while I hope he will resign from this fight, but he doesn't. If not for the situation, I would probably smile at the thought, because that's one of these few things that makes me think about the boy he was all these years ago. So many years have passed, but nothing has affected his stubbornness.

The situation gets even more complicated when Jiraiya appears. I could fool Kisame and Naruto easily, but one of the Sannins... He's different, but I'm not afraid.

_Sasuke... Forgive me what I'll have to do._

Once again I ask for forgiveness I'll never receive, and which I didn't deserve.

* * *

_(Sasuke)_

I face him once again and the truth is that I'm scared.

_It's not happening. It's not true._

Itachi... He's not my brother, as my brother is dead already. He's been dead for all these years that have passed since the massacre. That's what I try to tell myself, but my mind refuses to accept that simple true, because the man that stands before me has his face - my brother's face.

I bite my lips and narrow my eyes. I have no chakra left and this man... this man still has that last jutsu.

_Does it mean I've already lost?_

He looks at me and his eyes look strangely now, after tomoes have disappeared from them. He walks slowly in my direction and I try to move back, but all of sudden a wall appears behind my back. I press my back against the wall and look at the man who used to be my brother and now wants to steal my eyes.

'My eyes... My...' he says reaching out the hand in my direction.

_I can't escape._

He's coming closer and closer and I can't escape. My heart is pounding hard in my chest.

_I can't escape._

I can't move, my body refuses to accept my will. Itachi is just a few steps away from me, he reaches out his hand, and...

His fingers poke on my forehead and his hand slips, leaving bloody marks on my forehead and my cheek. And then Itachi falls down.

I glance at him, look at his face and these eyes that seem to gaze at me and can't believe it's the end.

_I did it..._

It starts to rain and that's the last thing I realize before everything turns black.

* * *

_(Itachi)_

_You grew strong, Sasuke. It's not something I could deny now, after seeing what you can do and what you can't. There still are many things that you have to learn, though. Judging what is true and what is not is one of them, but that is something you'll have to discover on your own._

Once I've admitted it, I can feel proud of my little brother. The fight is over in the way I expected it to end. I let myself enjoy that short moment of calmness, but quickly I remember that there is something more that should be done.

With some effort I force my body to move and pace slowly in my little brother's direction. It's like the last act of the play we both have taken part in and soon the final curtain will fall, covering forever the truths that should never be revealed.

'My eyes... My...' I say, and ironically, the words fit the situation well.

I try not to blink, although that strange dark shadow tainting my vision is in some way irritating. The world loses its colours and shape and seeing my closest surroundings requires almost as much effort as walking. Even my hand, reached out in Sasuke's direction, seems to weight tons.

I've finally finished all the preparations necessary for my jutsu and what I need to do now is to simply touch my brother's forehead. Then I'll be able to rest. Finally, after so many years.

The world is being covered by darkness and now I have to fight for every single breath. I force myself to move, counting voicelessly every step I take.

I can't see Sasuke's face.

Instead I see something else. We both are in our usual training place, on the Konoha outskirts. It's a warm sunny day, one of these we both have always loved. I've just finished my training session and stay still, listening to a silent rustle of leaves. I see my little brother running to me. He's smiling and not afraid of anything and anyone. I raise my hand, poke him on the forehead and smile seeing his pouting face.

'Sorry, Sasuke, maybe next time,' I whisper and the vision disappears.

I feel a sudden urge to smile. All these memories buried for years are back now and this one time I don't have to fight them back. It's doesn't matter anymore, not this time, as it is the end. The real end.

Under the tips of my fingers I can feel the warmth of Sasuke's skin. I gently brush his forehead and cheek, fully aware that my fingers paint crimson marks on his face, although I can't see them, and then let my hand fall along my body. The jutsu has been completed and my brother should be safe now. It's the only protection I can give him and I hope he'll take my place and finish what I have started.

There is no strength left and I can't resist that darkness around me any longer. My body does not respond to my will anymore and I give in, letting the darkness embrace me. My mind sinks in that black void and there is only one thought left.

_Forgive me, Sasuke, for what had to be done..._

* * *

_(Sasuke)_

_It can't be..._

My eyes open widely when I try to understand what that strange man, calling himself Madara, has been trying to explain to me, but my brain refuses to cooperate. My heart pounds hard in my chest and I need to take a few deep breaths in order to calm myself down.

Could it be that I was wrong? That for all that time I've been following some illusion and because of that illusion I decided to sacrifice everything? That I have made choices which from the beginning were wrong?

_No, it can't!_

I desperately try to convince myself about the rightness of my actions and my decisions. In my head pictures of smiling Itachi that I remember from my childhood once again mix with pictures of that other Itachi who tried to steal my eyes and who would not hesitate to kill me.

My fists clench involuntarily and the nails mark the skin of my palms. My heart beats even faster than it did before and my whole body tenses.

_Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out._

I hang my head trying to focus my thoughts on something. It doesn't matter what it will be as long as it prevents me from thinking. I don't wan to think anymore.

A sudden stab of pain shoots through my chest, almost making me double. After a short while it's back again. Long seconds pass, but the pain doesn't disappear, so I focus my thoughts on breathing again.

Despite myself I feel a sudden urge to face HIM and ask about the answers – the _true_ answers. I want to hear it from him, not from the man I've just met.

_Is that true what the man has said? IS IT, ITACHI!?_

_Why didn't you tell me that? Why did you lie?_

_Why did you decide to live with the burden of such a truth, not wishing anyone to know about it?_

_Why did you leave me in such a way?_

_WHY!?_

I close my eyes and try to ignore what I've been told, but it's not something that can be done easily in such a situation. I'm aware that the man has been watching me, but I don't care.

Finally I realize I'll never get my answers.

_What have I done?_

All of sudden sorrow appears and the feeling overwhelms me. Once again I see Itachi's smiling face and once again I remember the kind and gentle person he was years ago, and because of this thought something breaks inside of me. Tears flow down my face and I can't stop them.

In the ocean of mixed and intense emotions, which I feel, one thought appears.

_Why? Brother..._

* * *

THE END

A/N: So... It's official - Itachi loved his little brother and tried to protect him. The raw literally says the following: during the massacre Itachi killed himself in order to carry out the mission. Accept it. I don't really like Sasuke that much, but what Kishi is doing to him right now makes me eh... It's even hard to explain. Besides, isn't the man killing us with all these plot twists?


End file.
